One night and one more time, thanks for the memories even though they weren't so sweet.

well well, yesterday turned out alright indeed. A good day at last, amidst the slew of terrible days. It's more than compensated for the god forsaken days i've been running through for a while now. Now whats left is to see how things turn out, a step at a time.

Auf weidersehen

13. and bullshit. thats all i have to say. poke the angry ogre.

Auf-friggin-weidersehen.

Voting is over. In about 23 and a half hours time, we'll find out who are the favoured 13. oh dear oh dear oh dear..... i hope i'm in. We shall see.

will you be there to hold my hand when the moment of truth is upon us?

Auf weidersehen

another funky song. whoopie doo... destressing material indeed.

a rather amusing song. if you're feeling cranky.

I would very much like you to be there with me. I fear i will need that bastion of support that you are. The hope that you give life to, and the light that springs forth from your very presence.

Evenstar... Aniron, tye-melane Undomiel.

Auf weidersehen

The Elections draw ever closer, and whilst we quiver in fear and sheer anticipation, the Darklings remain confident of their eventual triumph. Spouting rhetoric and self assured confidence, they preach honesty, integrity, endurance, passion! Viva la Union! Viva la Revolution! I'm afraid. really. A young boy wielding a notched and rusty sword facing off the Devil. i'm frustrated at my inability to act but to watch while they march on, their corrupted touch sullying the waters, and charring the very land upon which they trod. Once more, they unwittingly kill that which they claim to love, all in the quest for power. Power corrupts. Is that so? I have felt the eddying currents that have stirred within me ever since i first tasted power. The sweet taste of authority. Hold it in, learn to control the monster within.

Come Friday, we're going to have to go through the real thing. Devour your inner-demon. Don't let it devour you. If you fail, then you are lost, and that which we love will be deeply scarred. Come Friday, we will wield words as we have never done before, veiling our intentions behind a pretentious mask of chill dignity. Come Friday, the result of a year's work on our part will come to fruitition. And Come Friday, we will see that once more, popularity truimphs over capability, and that the deserving, do not always attain that which they desire.

Vote for Farhan, Yuting, Glenn, Sarah, John, Geraldine, Kay, Tat Yi and Derek for TPSU, come 22nd May, to 24th May, at the SDC building, Cyber Centre.

Auf weidersehen

I remain, as before, unsure. and thus no further course of action is possible as of yet.

Old rabbits dye lard, and old habits die hard. Its 4.15a.m, and i'm in a land where all i see are pink fluffy leg hairs and green whipped potato. sorry, i really haven't gotten over the trauma of having to stay up and work with my current ill health. ah the rigours of poly life. I. want. to. sleep. and. i. shouldn't. be. blogging. now.

ok bye.

Auf weidersehen. and farhan, LEPAK!

On the request of a certain lady by the name of Goh Leyu Lois, i shall update my blog. see, staring at my blog does magically trigger an update.
Fun aside, its been a day of gloom and doom. It's depressing i swear, attending the Elections workshop today. If the misguided and deluded bunch of delinquients and queers(not lazy people) are going to be the next main committee of the 8 Clubs and the Union, i am SERI-OUSLY worried. i doubt, at this critical juncture, that i can muster the votes to make it into the much sought after Council of 13. Either way, i'm gonna make my presence felt in the Union. If its going to be some dumb arse donkey-loving sonofagun who's taking my place, they either deliver, or i'll give them hell in a shoebox.
On a darker note, my tenacious hold on what little i had left in me has begun to waver. without the guardian strength that has gone without, i'm succumbing slowly but surely. The dark tendrils creep across the sickly expanse of my chest, its chill touch sending shudders of pain shooting through me. ok thats an exaggeration, but not much of one. I've been wracked terribly today, and I can but pray that it is but a consequence of my rather unbecoming lifestyle recently, and that a change that will come aobut soon will remedy it. But i doubt that i'll be let off so easily for punishing my body so over the past months.

Don't you feel it, precious? A new surge of hope. A solitary oasis on the horizon of a sun-scorched land of blasted rock and dead ground. Dare we believe that it heralds a new hope for us? Is it but a brief reprieve from the long dry spell brought about by the crazed roach? Can we at last lay our heads down, and know that we have at last come to journey's end? We would like to do that, wouldn't we, precious? But we cannot be certain, and till we are certain, we will never rest, we continue to hunger, and we will continue to long for its presence, precious.

we will see, yes we will, precious. Auf weidersehen. and as Lois would say, Live Well and Prosper.

Confounded electronic demon, my laptop is malfunctioning again. Must be all those ants crawling around inside. Or maybe not. Anyway i guess the time for hysterics have passed, I'm feeling much less.. angsty, to use the teenage term. Its been quite a while since i last posted anything of consequence. Needless to say, what i've been posting recently does not classify as intelligent, thought provoking material, as much as i would like to think it does. Oh and i'm blogging now because i'm really bored. There's a serious case of ennui here, someone please dial 995, or 911, whichever you prefer. And while you're at it i can get my persistant and i suppose chronic chest pains checked out. But you aren't really going to call for help, are you? Nope. Not a chance of you doing that for lil 'ol me is there? Ok I'm a little high now, perhaps a side effect of being bored, and the fact that half of the posting page isn't working.
The misadventures of my laptop aside, I wasn't speaking crypticly in my previous post. I was being rather more literal than i usually am. Perhaps someone will understand what i was getting at. Peraps no one will. It's no loss. I didn't have a specific purpose in saying that anyway. If anyone knows the following verses, let me know. I've yet to find someone who has the same interest as me. Obsession maybe:

When the cold of winter comes,
Starless night will cover day
In the veiling of the sun
We will walk in bitter rain.

But in dreams i still hear your name
and in dreams we will meet again.

Auf weidersehen

Its been so long since then. I've yet to find the grace to forgive you. Even a minor incident, it raises my ire to such a degree that my ailment returns to torment me. You don't see the world they way we do. Don't even pretend that you understand how some are forced to endure the fallacies of society, while you sit prim and proper, feeding off the silver spoon that you were so fortunate as to be born with. How apt, your chosen domain. You rest, resplendant beneath its reassuring glory. Yet within, you know that if it should be stripped from you, you are nothing, an insignificant being. Without the guile to survive, without the mind to endure, without the soul to live. Go on. Mock us lesser beings. Someday, whether it be within my lifetime or not, you will fall. And be ready, for all those you have scorned before will take their turn to return the favour. I'm tired, ill. The hurt doesn't go away anymore. It resides, a throbbing reminder of my weakness, within my body, where my heart lies. It hurts... I do not seek to diagnose it, for the fear of what it maybe, and what it may mean.
A look at the brighter side, I'm sure now, that over the span of a few days, its taken root. Time will tell, whether it will come to bloom. Auf weidersehen

After a rather extensive hiautus from this dusty land, i've decided to spam a little. I think and i think and i think, and nothing changes. Looks like brain power isn't good for much. I've spent quite some time and brain juice running and re-running the scenario through nonetheless, and the only result i've got from that is turning my brain into something nasty. Anyway to sum up things, the present circumstances really sucks the big one.

I've got quite a plethora of thoughts roiling around in my melting pot of a mind at the moment, but its getting pretty challenging to bring them down into words without being indiscreet. Don't suppose I could do with more reading, now? My literary prowess seems to be waning at a rather fearsome pace. My hopes are waning along side, my hopes for a rather unrelated matter. Perhaps i was expecting too much, perhaps I thought too much, perhaps its all simply a matter for jest, which ever the case may be, I'm seriously feeling like shite at the moment. Had i been sane, I'd have decided upon a course of action and taken it upon my self to see it unto the end. Oh well, I shall remain a mildly retarded, senile and dememted spirit wandering the school grounds. Holy water, anyone?

I've not really blogged about FO yet, have I? Everyone's been blogging raving about how wonderful it was, what a great learning experience it provided, how enlightened they were at the end of it all, the joy of having met all those people and what not. I wish i could say the same. Believe me, i want nothing more than to truthfully say that it was a helluva Freshmen Orientation, and that I loved it. But hey ho, let's go, its not the case. Suffice to say while this year's FO had its bright moments, there were way too many moments when i felt like murdering a whole lot of people for the lack of a more suitable means of displaying my considerable displeasure. But being the consumate optimist, i shall focus on the bright side of things! I met quite a few lovely people this year, each in their own respect. Thank god for them, or there'd be just about nothing else to prevent me from going under with the absolutly abysmal conduct of the GLs.

Alright then, there's not much to say for now. Rather, I haven't quite figured how to couch the remaining thoughts in presentable english yet, so its about time for me to be off then. I find myself yearning for your presence by my side once more. Leave events to weave their own intricate web between the rather dingy pillars of my existance. Auf weidersehen, dear vonlichenstein

How now, brown cow?

I've felt a rather disturbing (in a good way, i keep reassuring myself) surge of feelings recently. Good lord, i can't believe how my interior workings can be changed so drasticaly so quickly. Just days ago i was vehemently denying that such a thing was ever going to happen. Guess you'll really never know till it happens. I'm beginning to see an excellent incentive to join Scythia in future outings. The presence of several deterent factors aside, there's this one person who allows me to speak the way I prefer to, without having to explain myself repeatedly. Well I'm glad then that i made the first step despite my inhibitions and doubts. Perhaps there's hope yet, in this generation of young adults and teens who have the misguided belief that adopting a terrible western accent or using western slang and euphorisms transforms them into the personification of coolness. Of course accents are sometimes the product of subconscious external influences, and perhaps i ought not to generalise. That and the fact I myself occasionally subconsciously adopt an accent when I begin to speak proper English. Hypocrite! I hear them cry, but thats just too bad. I do deal in double standards, as and when it suits me. Well not as and when it suits me, but as and when its not unethical to do so.

Speaking of which, I've come to notice that I'm quite an elitist. Certain people will know what i mean. Hopefully my elitist dream will not be shattered come 25th May. Support the domination of the elitist bastards, vote for farhan and john and tat yi and yuting and geraldine and adrian and kimberly and glenn and myself! ok that was shameless self promotion, but I'm in the mood for such nonsense now. Right, time to quit blabbering here and head back to serious work.

Auf weidersehen.